Trigger Warning

If I can help

just one person by saying,

life is worth living,

the pain is worth feeling,

to see what tomorrow brings,

there may be light

and other things

that can give you pause,

and know you are worthy

and that there is just cause

to keep staying the course,

even though it feels forced

and not what your mind

thinks it wants to do.

But no matter what you think

people love you

and want you here. They do.

So stay.

Through the pain

and the it doesn’t matter

and people won’t care

and my life won’t get better,

I know those feelings

I feel them too,

I get you’re doing what you wanted to do.

I also know it’s the saddest of choices, it’s true.

I’d rather you still be here,

feeling blue,

so we can talk about it

and see what we can do,

not to make things better

but so you can keep being you.

Because all of us who have tried

sit silent

overwhelmed with

what it feels like inside

to be there

in that moment

and grateful to still

be here in this one.

Because it is so painful

and deep

to feel so unworthy to live

and that secret to keep,

and for that success to be real for some

makes me feel numb,

and want to hold and help anyone

who has gone there and won.

Every time I think it’s over

it’s not really done

and out of the blue will

will come another one

pounding at my heart

wanting me to come

and I grasp for the light

to let love win.

Can we begin to see clearly

what is happening again

and always and all around

so another soul won’t leave too soon

and hope for living can be found,

deep within all this pain

unafraid of the conversation

again and again.


Lady Beastie